How to Exit a Room Like a Man

You’re at a party. Maybe someone made you go, cornered you at work or school and you couldn’t think of an excuse fast enough to dodge the invitation. Or perhaps you showed up to a social event that held the promise of being a fun shindig, but after listening for 20 minutes to a lady explain the pros and cons of buying an Accord over a Camry and being forced into a conga line against your will, all you want to do is make like a baby and head out. A lot of men find themselves trapped in these kinds of situations, wanting to stick a pencil in their eye but afraid to make an escape attempt.

On Gifts for Women

In the millennia that have followed, homo sapiens invented the wheel, the laptop, the foam fan finger, and put a man on the moon. But men have not yet developed a system for buying the women in their lives meaningful gifts for special occasions. As a public service, I offer this gifting system for the homo sapiens.

On Being A Driving Gentlemen

Don’t drive slowly in the right – passing – lane. This is one of those indiscretions that not only is a scourge to everyone’s dad’s blood pressure but is against the law in many states. The right lane is for passing – slower traffic keeps left! Driving slowly in the right lane forces people to pass on the left and it can also form an impenetrable “roadblock” for the person behind you if you’re going the same speed as the car in the other lane.