Why Ancient Greek Sculptures Have Small Penises

Poseidon (Zeus)

Poseidon (Zeus)46 B.C.
National Archaeological Museum, Athens

Statue of a Kouros

Statue of a Kouros6th century B.C.

National Archaeological Museum, Athens
The ancient Greeks famously fetishized the male body in sculptures that represent powerful, illustrious men as hulking figures with taut, rippling muscles. Sometimes these figures appear partially clothed in drapery or cloth; often, they are stark naked.

To the contemporary eye, their bodies are ideal—except for one, ahem, seminal detail. “They have small to very small penises, compared to the average of humanity,” art historian Andrew Lear, a specialist in ancient

Countless contemporary art lovers and historians have been struck by the modest nature of the phalluses that feature in classical sculptures of gods, emperors, and other elite men—from Zeus to celebrated athletes. The small members seem at odds with the massive bodies and mythically large personalities they accompany. But the ancient Greeks had their reasons for this aesthetic choice.

The Farnese Hercules, copy of The Weary Hercules by Lysippos

The Farnese Hercules, copy of The Weary Hercules by Lysippos3rd
Naples National Archaeological Museum, Naples

Statue of a Victorious Youth

Statue of a Victorious Youth300 -100 BCE
J. Paul Getty Museum
Rewind to the ancient Greek world of around 400 BC, and you’ll find that large, erect penises were not considered desirable, nor were they a sign of power or strength. In his play The Clouds (c. 419–423 BC), the ancient Greek playwright Aristophanes summed up the ideal traits of his male peers as “a gleaming chest, bright skin, broad shoulders, tiny tongue, strong buttocks, and a little prick.”
Historian Paul Chrystal has also conducted research into this ancient ideal. “The small penis was consonant with Greek ideals of male beauty,” he writes in his book In Bed with the Ancient Greeks (2016). “It was a badge of the highest culture and a paragon of civilization.”
In ancient Greek art, most of a great man’s features were represented as ample, firm, and shiny—so why weren’t these same aesthetic principles applied to the penis? As Lear and other historians suggest, part of the answer lies in how the phalluses of less admirable men were portrayed.

Attributed to the Pisticci Painter, Terracotta bell-krater (mixing bowl), ca. 430–410 B.C. Courtesy of The Metropolitan Museum of Art.

Attributed to the Pisticci Painter, Terracotta bell-krater (mixing bowl), ca. 430–410 B.C. Courtesy of The Metropolitan Museum of Art.

Terracotta amphora (jar), ca. 500–490 B.C. Courtesy of The Metropolitan Museum of Art.

Lustful, depraved satyrs, in particular, were rendered with very large, erect genitals, sometimes almost as tall as their torsos. According to mythology, these creatures were part-man, part-animal, and totally lacked restraint—a quality reviled by Greek high society. “Big penises were vulgar and outside the cultural norm, something sported by the barbarians of the world,” writes Chrystal. Indeed, across many an amphora pot and frieze, well-endowed satyrs can be seen drinking and pleasuring themselves with abandon.
In Greek comedy, fools also routinely sported large genitals—“the sign of stupidity, more of a beast than a man,” according to Chrystal. So, too, did artistic representations of the Egyptians, says Lear, who were long-time enemies of the Greeks.
In this way, satyrs, fools, and foes served as foils to male gods and heroes, who were honored for their self-control and intelligence (along with other qualities requiring restraint, like loyalty and prudence). If large phalluses represented gluttonous appetites, then “the conclusion can be drawn that the small, flaccid penis represented self-control,” explains Lear.

Laocoön and His Sons, as restored today (probably the original or a Roman copy)

Hagesandros, Polydoros, and Athanadoros of Rhodes

Laocoön and His
Musei Vaticani,
While today, being well-endowed is often equated with power and even sound leadership, “the penis was never a badge or virility or manliness in ancient Greece as it was in other cultures,” Chrystal writes. “Potency came from the intellect needed to power man’s responsibility to father children, prolong the family line and the Oikos [the family unit or household], and sustain the polis [the city-state].”
There is no doubt that across ancient Greek art, the representation of the phallus—and its varying size—was symbolic. As Lear suggests, this might hint at why artists of the age depicted male nudes so often, even when a character or narrative might not require it. “They used the penis as an index of character,” explains Lear. “It said something.”
Back then, it indicated whether or not a man was upstanding. But while the cultural symbolism of the penis has since shifted, some things haven’t changed. Then, as now, the male sex was seen to be the distillation of a man’s ability to dominate.
By Alexxa Gotthardt
Be Great,
Rushabh Thakker | TheFineMen

One thought on “Why Ancient Greek Sculptures Have Small Penises

  1. First of all I have to say that the difference between the Greek ideal and the current is inexistent if you look at action heroes. Mamma mia:))!!!! Also surprised that you didn’t know that the Greeks were 100 % assfreaks; completely round asses, VERY small penises and of course shaved bodies. Gay men over 30 will always confirm that a very small penis makes the ass look a LOT rounder!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Like

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